Things I would rather do instead of going to school tomorrow:

  1. Be sexually violated with a rake.
  2. Listen to “Party Rock” on repeat.
  3. Help Rick Santorum campaign for president.
  4. Burn my girl scout cookies.
  5. Have my leg humped by a cat in heat continuously.
  6. Spend a day with a group of hormonal, 12-year-old girls.